Shervin Hojat, Ph.D.

Have you traveled by a car while resting your heavy luggage on your lap?

Have you gone hiking while carrying a heavy luggage?

Have you gone to a dinner with a friend while taking all your books with you in a big backpack?

Above scenarios do not sound fun and are stressful to your body.

You may laugh and say that most people do not do what I am mentioning.

I agree! It is easy to become aware of physical heavy load and not carry it with us everywhere.  

There are other loads that we carry around with us without being aware of them. They are emotional and psychological loads.

I can tell by my own experience; those loads are harder on my body than load of heavy books in a luggage!

What makes emotional and psychological load heavy?

Fear, regret, resentment, and judgement create a heavy load.

Most of us maybe carrying those heavy loads and are used to them.

You may ask, how do I know if I am carrying the load?

It is simple and requires paying attention.

Is your life often joyful without any reason?

Do you feel relaxed during day or waiting for the other shoe to drop?

Do you worry a lot?

Do you care more about happiness of others than your own?

Do you have chronic pain in your body?

Do you do things out of obligation (with resentment that may not be aware of) or try to do them with joy?

Pay attention to your breathing and body. If you feel tense you are carrying luggage and a load!!!

Does this luggage and load really belong to you? Does it serve you by owing and carrying it?

Do yourself a big favor.

 Leave the luggage behind as if you check in at an airport. It is free to check them in!

Become free like a bird and enjoy yourself for few hours or minutes. You will appreciate the difference.

After-all, the luggage may not be your luggage and you may decide not to re-claim it.

Or you decide you like to move around freely and you let go of content of those luggage.

Copyright @2019 by Shervin Hojat

We all have experienced kind and impact-full loving people in our lives.

Strangers who show up out of nowhere, stay around for few minutes or years. Sometimes even family members fulfill that role.

I had many people who have had played that important role in my life.  Family members such as my dear aunt and strangers played roles of teachers and friends.

You may think you were lucky when met that special person. Now you may not feel lucky, especially if that person no longer is around. After all, how many times can you become lucky in your lifetime?

Many of us are in lack mentality. We try to hold on the good things and avoid the unpleasant. We may be believing that there are only limited good things going around or we do not deserve unlimited blessings.

Look at the events in your life. How many times have you been lucky? How many times unsettling events turn out positively?

Were all of those events pure luck? Or something else?

If we accept concept of pure luck, then loosing people that we appreciate, the job we love, all cause us pain and suffering.

 If we focus on source of our blessings, then life transitions are much less traumatic and painful and we always feel connected and blessed.

Over times, I have come to understanding that the force behind the scene brings events, people to me for my own good. This force whose by-product are many blessings is felt as joy and appreciation in my heart.

I may lose a job that I loved which was supporting me for many years. Another job will show up out of nowhere in a timely manner. I may not physically be with my mother right now, but other people show up from nowhere, provide motherly love and support toward me, when I need it.

I have learned to be appreciative of people and events. I also I know it is important not to be attached to the job or the people. They all may disappear; but there is only one constant.

I have realized what stays constant is the support and blessings that I continuously receive from the Universe (even though at times I may be blinded to it).

 Looking back, the support has been constant. It does not mean I did not feel pain or suffered due to my own resistance, beliefs or mindset. I have received the essentials needed for my survival, spiritual and personal growth up till now.

How many times have you been lucky? How many times unsettling events turn out positively?

Were all of those events pure luck? Or something else?

Copyright @2019 by Shervin Hojat

You have heard the phrase, “Let it go and become free”.

You may ask, how can one let go of big hurts and disappointments?

It is not easy to let go of big issues and yet is doable.

It is like wanting to get in shape.

You do not start with running in a big marathon to get in shape. You start with small steps, like walking or biking every day first.

In letting go, you also start small. You make letting go of small things a practice and a habit.

 As your habit is stabilized and you realize value of letting go (even small things), you become your own advocate for letting go of big things that seem impossible to release.

What are some small steps you can take in letting go of?

• Let go of anger about driver who cuts you off on the road. Focus on what is going well on the road instead.
• Let go of disappointment about your mistakes and shortcomings. Focus on what things you have done right and not acknowledged.
• Let go of memory of hard day at work. Take a warm shower, or walk in nature.

Letting go is similar to building muscle and strength.

Letting go requires practice and patience.

Letting go requires having compassion for yourself and others.

Letting go requires valuing your peace more than fighting to be right to satisfy your ego. 

What a small issue can you let go of now?

Copyright @2019 by Shervin Hojat

We erect invisible walls defining who we are and how we should function within those walls.

How do we recognize such walls?

Those walls can be felt and sensed.

As we get close to those walls in boundaries of our lives, at first, we have feeling of contraction and fear.

Observe your feelings when you feel fear and are very uncomfortable in an aspects of your life. You are at the edge of such wall.

The wall is our safe identity and comfort even though it confines us.

In some areas of our lives, the wall may be several yards away and we may feel more sense of freedom, expansion and joy.

Through awareness, hard work, humility, non-attachment and divine intervention we push these walls farther away.

We may measure our success in life in how large of an area we are walled in compared to others.

We are still walled in.

What would our lives be like if those walls did not have any impact on behavior at all?

Copyright @2019 by Shervin Hojat