Do you worry if your friends may not like or approve of you? If so, you probably have some reactive charge within you. Perhaps it may be the feeling of a child who does not like disapproval or ridicule and perhaps as a result you are avoiding feeling the childhood feelings again.
Intellectually, we may know that we should not care what other people think about our thoughts, careers or how we express ourselves. However, we may not understand this emotionally!
If we, in the past, were ridiculed and have not resolved what we have felt, then we are carrying a charge within us. To remove or let go of this charge, usually negative, we are sometimes required to feel the same feeling (remember) when we were shamed or ridiculed. By facing, welcoming, and loving what we are feeling, the reactive power of that event will be able to be released.
Shame of Being
Lurking in the dark corner of the room
a person stares at me.
The critical voice of an adult
index finger wagging.
You should not be this way.
What is wrong with you?
You are stupid!
The voice echoed with a tone of superiority
crushing the young soul.
Willing to face the critical voice,
the fear and threat of humiliation
are transmuted into courage.
Focused eye of a child
now in an adult body
looks toward the dark corner.
I am no longer afraid of you!
I do not need your approval!
I forgive you!
I allow me
to be comfortable
I am more than I ever imagined!
Copyright @ 2012 by Shervin Hojat
This is really uptilfing *sigh* I dont like that I have this problem and I try to keep things in perspective because I know the world doesn’t revovle around myself but at times I just get the feeling that everyone is looking at me and judging me for my every mistake, it makes it hard to even interact with people without being even in the least anxious. This is uptilfing though and I will def turn my problems to the Lord because at this point he is the only one that can help me. Thanks for the post and your helping people like us by just talking about your situations and giving us all courage.