For many, especially males, it is taboo to express feelings by crying. We all have noticed the fun made of public figures for showing their emotions. It is interesting that it is more acceptable for people to show their anger and frustration (be it inappropriately) rather than cry in public.
I personally welcome expressing my grief and joy with tears. When I am open to crying, I know I have less emotional energy blockage (feel more alive). Crying (expressing our emotions) is like a rain that washes our emotional body.
Last week, I re-connected with a friend of mine, William, after 15 months. I had previously found out that his wife of 37 years had passed away due to cancer. When I met him, I awkwardly expressed my regret for his wife passing. We hugged each other and we both cried. Later on he approached me and apologized for making me upset by crying. I told him that it is good to cry and that it is very healing. For me, I was showing my empathy for his loss and also was honoring and celebrating the dedication that two people had for each other for so long. Tears are the best way to express joy and grief at the same time.
In the context of Tending to Your Garden Within, it is important to water our garden within with tears of gratitude, grief and joy. If we limit the types of rain in our garden within we will miss many great opportunities for the growth of our trees and plants and may face an artificial drought of our soil (soul). The poem below emphasizes this concept further.
OK to Cry
It is OK to be vulnerable.
It is OK to cry.
It is OK to be a male and cry.
Let your tears flow.
Let your tears wash away your sorrow.
Bring back the shine and warm glow to your heart.
Let your tears flow.
Mourn the loss of your beloved.
Rejoice in the memories of times past.
Let your tears flow.
Do not apologize for crying.
It takes courage to cry.
It takes courage to feel your heart’s longing.
Let your tears flow.
Empty out sorrow and grief with the flow of tears.
Wash and clean the house of your heart.
Get ready to welcome joy.
Let your heart glow.
Copyright @ 2011 by Shervin Hojat